A means to an end, a way to get from point a to point b. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line, but remember that may not always take you where you need to be.
I know not, from whence or where I have come. I know only that I am and I am in all. I can see into lives, and inside thoughts, but I cannot control. I observe. I think of myself as such, the Observer. I feel this is what I am. From time to time, it seems possible that through the strong feelings that I have due to a thought or action of the one I am observing, that I can change an action. This however, could be, only a flight of fancy from one that controls nothing but sees all. Perhaps, I am the river that the philosophers are forever speaking of, the one that you can never put your foot in at the same place. The ever moving coursing reality. I seem to be everywhere. No one touches me and I touch no one, yet in all places at all times I can be. There is only one friend of mine, if you can call him that. His name is Jason, or that is what I call him, we have never formally met. He seems to be like me in some ways but he can influence things in a direct way that I cannot. I follow him, like a teenage girl follows an idol. He does not know that I exist, yet he is the most fascinating thing to me. Everywhere and when I look things can always be done again, I can watch the landing on the moon a million times in a row, if I choose, I can see the first colony on Mars, or watch the first tomato form, this is just how things are for me, except for the places that Jason has been. When he walks into a room all bets are off, the course that things were to take are altered, once and for good. The extraordinary happens, things that have not been seen before even by the likes of me and for no reason that I can comprehend. Not to toot my own horn, but things that I cannot foresee let alone understand are rare to say the least. He is rare, one might even say unique in the true sense of the word. He is the only one that can do the things he does. For that matter so am I. For I am and that is all I know about me. There are no others like me, that I am aware of at least. Jason may know others, for all I know, but as he seems not to notice that I am here, who can say. Jason has not always been here either, of this much I am certain. Though I am equally certain he would think otherwise. Don’t ask me where this certainty comes from on my part. He has never shown me anything except his ability to change what should follow. He has not always been here though, and I should know, because I have. I am not sure he even knows what he is doing or why. It does not stop him from doing it though. I really wish I could get inside his head. Please allow me try to explain why he is so fascinating to me. Jason walked through room 431 only a little while ago. I was waiting for him in the chair reserved for overnight visitors in the hospital. I knew he was coming because what was supposed to happen didn’t. The flow of the entirety of every connection, that this man struggling to survive his battle with cancer touched, has changed. His son, Rob, not having lost his dad at a young age, never developed his intense drive to succeed so that first tomato on Mars was never grown. Jason did that. He just walked into the room, ran his hand through the man, then walked right out the window. I tried to follow him but as always he just slipped away. Then there is this moment where a very interesting guy I was observing from the inside of his thoughts was about to have a very profound moment of clarity that didn’t happen. He was calmly talking to himself. “Have you ever had those moments that you know are real but maybe they just happened in your mind? Like that dream where you need to pee? What about when you thought a situation would go a certain way and then when the reality came it was nothing like you had thought it would be. Then years later you find that your thought of what should have happened is more vivid than the actuality? I wondered what it would be like at the end of a life when it flashes by you. Some people say that you live your whole life again. I wonder if you live your whole life over the way you want it to be and that is what they call heaven. Crazy thing is if you ever find out you never get the chance to tell anyone. If I ever get the courage to pull the trigger to this gun that I put to my head every evening before I go to bed and every morning when I wake up what I find out when the bullet goes in, goes out the other side with it”. What I knew was supposed to happen was that he was going to accidentally find out all those things that he would never be able to tell anyone. I had seen him have this type of conversation with himself for years. Not because I went to him that one time he went through with it, but because I found him to be interesting on other matters and visited him many times.
Jason walks into the room and moves the gun so that he misses and keeps walking.
The bullet intended for his head goes into the wall at the angle of the ceiling. The noise attracts a neighbor, that this guy has never met. He cries into her arms as he explains the noise. They form a bond and soon after a family. It just so happens that she is the daughter of the man that had cancer. Her listless brother and her new husband became friends and eventual business partners creating “manna” the food source of the world! Jason, fascinates me.
I can remember clearly those events in time that I followed, yet they did not occur. All the events that I follow after Jason has been involved become fixed to the course he sets. I can see I need set a few things straight, for those of you that live inside of time.
This is the way it works, for one such as I. Every possible scenario is available for me to view, I can follow the chain of events forward and backwards. I am fixed only by the person I am using to observe. Think of a concave lens touching a convex lens each at the center. )( The point at which they touch is the part of time I am currently observing. If I were to move backwards or forwards along any different vector the possibilities change as I move. You can think of this like a line that extends forever in either direction from the point at which the two lenses meet. That then, is the present moment of time I am currently viewing. When Jason has made no changes or movements, then I am free to explore whenever, wherever, with whomever I wish! If Jason has been involved, then many, many, many, possibilities are cut off. I can no longer view a past that would not lead up to the moment that he got involved! There are no more futures that do not represent the one that he set in motion!
I can see that did not clear things up for everyone. Perhaps, I should just continue to tell you the story of this family that now has a more direct path, a sort of straight line through time, thanks to Jason.
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From one writer to another, I hope you continue to write in the future. You're doing a great job. I enjoyed reading your work.